Gratitude Attitude

How grateful are your words? Do you tell others how much you appreciate their efforts, their talents, their smiles? Being grateful on the inside is good, being grateful on the outside is excellent!

Change Ain't Easy

Epiphany while vacuuming 

This morning, while vacuuming my carpets, I was thinking about two very dear friends of mine. I love them, so have them on my mind frequently. While they know about each other, the two haven't yet had the opportunity to meet. Interestingly, both are talking a lot about areas in their lives that they need to change. I agree with them and support the changes they are facing. My vacuum is rather loud, so it drowns out any other sound. It's a good time for me to do thinking. I was mulling over the conversations I've had with these two and of course was formulating solutions and some very sage advise. Then, BAM, I realized I was the one that needed the talking to and that awesome advise should be directed right back at myself!

Energy wasted

Seriously, how often do we spend time judging and fussing over the shortcomings, problems, and challenges of another? Now mind you, I wasn't being mean or judgy about my friends. I was just coming up with a solution or program that I thought would be helpful. But... What would it be like if I turned that energy right back at myself?

As much as my friends love me, I'm 98.5% certain they would kinda, sorta listen to my ideas and then continue on with their own. That's how humans are. For the most part, they are going to do what they have in their minds to do. Using my energy worrying about how to fix their problems is a serious waste of a great mind (mine, of course).

Example is better than a solution

After getting over the shock of the moment (yes, silly I know) and realizing that this was a good thing, it came to me that being an example is much more inspiring than giving someone, even a loved one, a neat and tidy solution. Really, change is not easy. Well, maybe little changes are, like getting a new shade of lipstick or trying a different style of shoes. Breaking out in small ways that are relatively safe is not all that difficult.

We all know that true and lasting change comes from thinking differently. For some, this seems easy. Yet, the core changes we make in our values and beliefs are extremely difficult. All the external pushes and pulls do not make for real change. What does is a new or altered way of thinking. And, that's where I hope to make a difference.

To help my two dear friends, I must help myself. I realize I have to first examine areas that I need fundamental change. There are a few things I need to really work on, And, I'm going to. With prayer, counsel, and determined new thinking, I will set the sail for this new course.

So, here's to spending less time trying to fix and figure for people who really haven't asked for it. I am super excited about this shift in energy. I bet they'll like it, too. They'll probably even ask me how I did it. Then....watch out!

Happiness comes from your own actions

What actions are you choosing? I say pick the ones that will bring encouragement, productivity, and peace. Happiness is sure to follow!

What's that dream?

Pursuing that deep dream that niggles your daytime thoughts, that haunts your nights, the one that pokes at you when life gets crazy - that's the seed of your destiny. It's calling you. It yearns to be feed and nurtured. Dare I say, it's your one, true purpose!

Right now I am working with an amazing client. She is one of the most gifted writers I've had the pleasure to know. Her unique voice gives life to deep spiritual concepts and lends humor to life's journey. In her 60's, she's just now honoring her hunger for writing. I'm so very proud of her for taking the "big leap" and allowing herself to fully dive into her life passion. She has the riches of an interesting life to incorporate into her work and has a wealth of wisdom to share. Facilitating this process as her coach is an honor.

One of the pieces of her process is to blog regularly. I'd love to have you check out her work at Limping to Jerusalem. Give Claudia some encouragement, help her with constructive feedback. She's worthy!

What's that dream that haunts you? I'd love to walk you through the process of making it happen. Drop me a note here: ShineConsulting. Together we can honor your special dream and tap into the unique powers you have to make it true.

Hold the vision

"People are often unreasonable, irrational, and self centered.
Forgive them anyway.

If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives.
Be kind anyway.

If you are successful, you will win some unfaithful friends and some genuine enemies.
Succeed anyway.

If you are honest and sincere, people my deceive you.
Be honest and sincere anyway.

What you spend years creating, others could destroy overnight.
Create anyway.

If you find serenity and happiness, some may be jealous.
Be happy anyway.

The good you do today, will often be forgotten.
Do good anyway.

Give the best you have, and it will never be enough.
Give you best anyway.

In final analysis, it is between you and God.
It was never between you and them anyway."

~~Kent Keith~~

Your words have great power.

Here's an excellent way to start the week. Remember Miguel Ruiz's points from The Four Agreements: A Practical Guide to Personal Freedom:

1. Be Impeccable With Your Word
Speak with integrity. Say only what you mean. Avoid using the word to speak against yourself or to gossip about others. Use the power of your word in the direction of truth and love.

2. Don't Take Anything Personally
Nothing others do is because of you. What others say and do is a projection of their own reality, their own dream. When you are immune to the opinions and actions of others, you won't be the victim of needless suffering.

3. Don't Make Assumptions
Find the courage to ask questions and to express what you really want. Communicate with others as clearly as you can to avoid misunderstandings, sadness and drama. With just this one agreement, you can completely transform your life.

4. Always Do Your Best
Your best is going to change from moment to moment; it will be different when you are healthy as opposed to sick. Under any circumstance, simply do your best, and you will avoid self-judgment, self-abuse and regret."

Image Source: Karen Salmonsohn

What are you investing in?

So often we put all of our resources into career building, social climbing, a killer wardrobe, or the perfect body. All are fine and good. Yet, where are you when something happens and it's taken from you? What's left are the true riches, or lack there of, that matter - character, relationships, spirituality, health, joy in living. What are you investing in today? 

Trust...

Trust is a fragile thing, easily shattered and difficult to repair. Be careful with those who place their trust in you. It's a worthy responsibility!

Image source: http://daves-words-of-wisdom.blogspot.co.uk/

What is your influence score?

"Respect is how to treat everyone, not just those you want to impress." 

~Richard Branson

Yesterday my friend and colleague Karen Keller asked me to take a survey. She's collecting data for her study on influence. Going through the process was an interesting experience. I had to rate myself in qualities such as trustworthiness, positive attitude, listening, the ability to take risks, and such. 

For providing Karen with my information, I am promised that I will receive an in-depth report that will rate my overall potential to influence, scores for each of my influence traits, an explanation of the scores and what they mean, improvement areas, blind spots, and recommendations for increasing overall influence. Great! I'm all for learning more about myself.

Initially, I zipped through the questions, thinking it was a simple exercise  As the questions progressed, I realized I had some serious thoughts about influence and what a responsibility it is. My reflections turned to the people who have influenced me through the years. Some where considered to be powerful influencers due to their leadership skills and other successes. Others made an impression just by being kind and available. 

I then thought about those that use gossip, social pressure, position, and bravado to influence. They use these as a means to get clients, peers, employees, and business associates to conform. Hmmmm. Sometimes it really works, helping them to become financially successful or climb to a position of power. But, for how long? Often these influencers cover their motivation with smiles and compliments, promising great things.

But in the end, whether they want to believe it or not, their ethics and morals shine through to others. 

When I finished the survey, I realized that for good or not so good, what's in one's heart, one's true motivation, doesn't stay hidden. I am looking forward to my results. Well, kind of. Like most people, I want to see high scores for being amazing. Yet, the most useful thing I can take from this experience is the revelation of what needs to change. 

If you are a leader, business owner, professional, or executive and are interested in participating in Dr. Karen Keller's work, go to http://influenceindicator.com/user/register. Username: influence and Password: survey.

Here's a little bit about Dr. Keller:

Karen Keller, Ph. D. is the Influence It! Life Coach for women and creator of the website Real Power For Women Who Want It. Unlike other psychologists, Karen is also a Master Certified Coach and the only modern-day teacher of Influence as a way of inner thinking and being…then ultimately doing for having more of what you (really) want. Her first book, "Stepping Stones to Success: Experts Share Strategies For Mastering Business, Life & Relationships" with Deepak Chopra, Jack Canfield, and Denis Waitley was published in 2010.

As I said, I'm looking forward to my report. How about you? What is your influence score? 

Shine on!

Don't let words and opinions limit your dream. I like this from Mark Twain:

"Keep away from people who try to belittle your ambitions. Small people always do that, but the really great make you feel that you, too, can become great." ~Mark Twain

I guess what I'm saying this morning is, get rid of limits imposed by yourself, as well as others. You have dreams, ideas, goals. Don't look for the ways you can't, look for the ways you can!

Shine On!

Image Source: http://www.flickr.com/photos/alexandrasnowdon/

Sow generously

Going above and beyond in service and generosity of spirit will always, always have it's rewards. The reverse is also true. Holding back, shorting another, being greedy, will come back with interest. This is one of those beautiful laws of the universe. Remember, what you sow, you will reap! 

Sow generously today! 

Image source: Jay Roeder

Being used up for a purpose

"This is true joy in life, the being used up for a purpose recognized by yourself as a mighty one; the being a force of nature instead of a feverish, selfish little clod of ailments and grievances complaining that the world will not devote itself to making you happy." ~George Bernard Shaw

Peace is always beautiful

"This is what you shall do; Love the earth and sun and the animals, despise riches, give alms to everyone that asks, stand up for the stupid and crazy, devote your income and labor to others, hate tyrants, argue not concerning God, have patience and indulgence toward the people, take off your hat to nothing known or unknown or to any man or number of men, go freely with powerful uneducated persons and with the young and with the mothers of families, read these leaves in the open air every season of every year of your life, re-examine all you have been told at school or church or in any book, dismiss whatever insults your own soul, and your very flesh shall be a great poem and have the richest fluency not only in its words but in the silent lines of its lips and face and between the lashes of your eyes and in every motion and joint of your body." ~Walt Whitman

Make giving a way of life

"Love has nothing to do with what you are expecting to get - only with what you are expecting to give - which is everything" ~Katherine Hepburn 

In our everyday world most of us operate on what we can get out of life, what big score can be made, what advantageous connection will get us the furthest ahead. It's sad when our focus is turned inward, because there is such abundance outside of ourselves that is missed.

When giving and sharing and helping others is the center of our attention, the world opens up in such a way a self-absorbed person can't imagine. Relationships develop that are genuine. Opportunities appear that aren't for the selfish. And, a deep sense of belonging is attained that money will never buy.

This context of giving to others serves us well in leadership and positions of authority. Try for one day to think only of those who work with and for you. Think to yourself, what can I do for those who actually get the work done? How can I give of my knowledge, position, or means that lends a hand to someone who doesn't expect it? What small or large way can I positively impact a life?

If you try this for one whole day, I promise you will be rewarded. Maybe not immediately, but it will come back to you. It will come in such a way that you'll want to do it again! And, then yet again. Soon, it will be a new way of managing, even possibly a new way of life.

Lead by teaching

"If you believe in peace, act peacefully; if you believe in love, acting lovingly; if you believe every which way, then act every which way, that's perfectly valid - but don't go out trying to sell your beliefs to the system. You end up contradicting what you profess to believe in, and you set a bum example. If you want to change the world, change yourself." ~Tom Robbins